All art is at once surface and symbol

You know how the other day I ranted about how being assertive didn't mean being an asshole, and that niceness =/= being a doormat? The latest episode of MLP: FiM makes me a happy, happy soul and I found myself cheering. Talk about an anvil that needed to be dropped! ilu Fluttershy. ;;

Inspired by becky_barrett, I'll step off from my Pokemon hiatus for a while to talk about Sacredshipping, aka Morty/Eusine. One of my all-time favorite Pokemon ships, those two make me fuzzy inside. And it's safe to say I like Eusine too. But this is the part where I differ from the majority. I love Sacredshipping, but not in the Anime, because I can't stand Anime!Eusine.

( Eusine puffs with pride at being mentioned, but alas, Suicune is at another castle. )

Hey guys! Wanna know how infamously glitchy Sonic 2006 is? Here ya go!



I've been watching the LP of Sonic 2006 to pass the time when Jean wasn't reading Homestuck with me, and lately, I've been getting a strange sense of nostalgia from my time in Sonic fandom. Hell, after I talked to Sipp on Plurk, I felt inspired to make an RP account for E-102 Gamma from Sonic Adventure 1, and did it. I'll refine it and make icons for him later after I replay the game. Just... wow. I used to love Gamma. :o And I totally shipped him with Amy. I still do.

Aside from Pokemon, Sonic the Hedgehog fandom had a lot of "firsts" for me. My first serious crush on a fictional character (Shadow the Hedgehog, which I felt a lot of guilt for, mostly because I was scared of being a "rabid fangirl" and that I was gonna be labeled as a "furry", though I eventually stopped caring about the latter. :P Former, on the other hand... hoo boy), the first time I started receiving attention for my work in fandom (not BNF-status, but I've had a couple strangers who went up to me and said, "Hey, aren't you the one who wrote that one fic/that Sonadow essay at ship_manifesto?" and gave me warm, fuzzy feelings inside. Usually those fans and I became friends. ;;), and hell, even the first time I wrote smut... a looooooooong story which deserves its own entry. :P Gods, the first AMV I ever made was a Shadow the Hedgehog AMV using "Bliss" by Tori Amos. I think I lost it and never recovered it, which is kind of a shame, but then again, I made a couple other old Sonic AMVs too, haha. XD

It's kind of painful for me to look back on my years in Sonic fandom since I went from being a cheerful fangirl who did what she loved to being a paranoid worrywart who was concerned what people and older fans thought of her because she loved Shadow and Sonadow and felt "ostracized" because she enjoyed playing the newer (at the time) games as well as the classics. When I look back on them now, Sonic Heroes and the games after them are crappy. Yet even knowing games like Shadow the Hedgehog are horrendously and painfully cheesy and has all these flaws and tries way too hard to be hardcore ("Where's that DAMN 4th Chaos Emerald!? DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN WATCH ME SAY DAMN."), I get a sense of guilty pleasure from them due to the time I spent with friends in fandom. Under normal circumstances, I would've found a character like Silver stupid and annoying, and today I really wish he didn't have to be another hedgehog, but... ngggh. Fucking Narm Charm. gjdskgjdksg

My heart will always belong to Sonic Adventure 2 and the earlier games like Sonic CD and S3&K though. Fuck yes.

I don't get me started how much I whined about Sonic elitists. It's like I spent the last part of my active years of Sonic fandom feeling "persecuted" and miserable, and it shows in the last few Sonadow fics I written. To the point I think my friends were calling me out for it. When I think about it, the more I want to strangle my past self. I was so concerned with being a "good" Shadow and Sonadow fan, even in the eyes of people who didn't like them, and... gdhskjghdkjsgh. I even gotten into fights with a couple friends about this, and lost one of them because of it. I spent too much time worrying about what other people thought. You can see why this was painful for me to think about. I feel like Karkat from Homestuck with his self-loathing and how much he detests his past self for being so moronic, 'cause I'm feeling exactly the same way when I look at myself in my late years of Sonic fandom.

As my Sonic obsession waned into hiatus (a little before I got into Earthbound), I finally got around to watching SatAM despite feeling "poisoned" and what do you know, I loved it. I started to mellow down, thank god, and stuck around to spazz about the series for a while. Sonic/Sally became my favorite het pairing for Sonic, I shipped Bunnie/Rotor, and it was around the time the Sonic Kink Meme (kinkyclosetzone, which I helped name) opened. It's pretty much dead now, I think. XD The other day, my friend and I were talking about robot sex ("How does it work? Transformers fandom is divided over this."), and though she wasn't much familiar with the fandom, I linked her to my favorite Shadow/Omega fic (NSFW, despite wires and robotics) for referential purposes. (Her response: "Hee hee. Code-fondling.")

So yesterday, I decided to browse the kink meme to read old fills. I came across an old request of mine, which wanted Sonic/Griff from the "Warp Sonic" SatAM episode. I went on, expecting nobody answered that one ever, except... bam. A fill. Written two months after I left it. And... it's fucking incredible. (NSFW) I don't know how I never saw that fic in my LJ message box, but it's been about three years before I finally read this fic. Even though the writer will probably never know my thanks, I left it anyway. God, I wonder if I should've de-anon'd myself. But just... I'M FEELING SO MUCH EMOTION. WHOEVER YOU ARE, YOU HAVE ALL MY LOVE IN THE WORLD. ;; I wonder if it's even someone I know, though I don't think I recognize the style. I can't help but feel guilty somehow. But still... anon, whoever you are. Thank you.

Reading that fic meant a lot to me, and I've been feeling sort of crummy lately. Namely about my creativity (or lack of it).

Sometimes, I wonder if ought to finish that humongous Sonadow fic I started that was going to be one of my fandom magnum opuses. Post-SA2, Shadow was caught in space and taken inside a hidden lab in the Mystic Ruins run entirely by a sentient supercomputer named P.A.N.D.O.R.A. PANDORA likes to build creepy advanced robots, including the Leviathan, and has experimented on an unconscious Shadow for three years. Shadow wakes up before he's "ready" and steals a Chaos Emerald one of the robots brought in and escaped. Sonic, having since moved on, is troubled why he still remembers a rival he barely knew. Meanwhile, Dr. Eggman wants to seek out PANDORA and claim the lost lab and the creations inside for his own. Shit goes down in Mystic Ruins and Sonic chases Dr. Eggman. The Leviathan is trying to hunt Shadow, and the two hedgehogs meet again... Cue "WTF!?" In short, Sonic and friends must stop Eggman while figuring out what the hell is up with the PANDORA business and its connection to Shadow. Sonic & Shadow begrudgingly work together, and end up more tangled in each another than they'd like to admit, playing right into PANDORA's logic-minded hand...

If I stopped to work on it, would I feel closure? Sometimes I wonder if I should save it as maybe a future original work, but the story is clearly written to be for the Sonic universe. To take out all the Sonic essence would be robbing it of its soul. I will never be able to unsee it as something that used to be "about Sonic." I'm like this with my other incomplete big fanfic projects I started too. Augh.

tl;dr: Puri was a self-pitying paranoid moron for her latter years in Sonic fandom, and is now wibbling over old crap and a lovely fic featuring a super obscure pairing someone left her in a time capsule. She then goes on to fret about her own fanfiction again. WHOO SELF-DEPRECATION

Damn blue hedgehogs giving me feelings.

I'm getting bored to tears on Pokemon White. Everyday, I'm humongously tempted to transfer all my needed Pokemon to my brother's Black cartridge and start a new game and try out different Pokemon, 'cause hatching eggs and raising them via EV training and constant battles in the sports stadiums isn't the same as being able to have an actual journey and save the world with your Pokemon, you know? But god, I wonder if it means I have to register all over again with the stupid Dream World, ugh. Little obnoxious things like that. I probably won't do it until it turns to summer, so I can see what happens if I give the scientist all the Deerlings he needs. Probably nothing really, but eh.

I'll also have to set up a date for the Livestream. And ugh, thinking about computer technicalities is making my brain hurt. :(

The SMRPG screencap adventure is on hold yet again, but typing this out will remind me it's there instead of having it stuck replaying it in my head over and over again. And there's still the unfinished N/Touko fic I've left alone for two weeks, which is another reason why I want to restart my White version so I can have the storyline and N's characterization fresh in my head.

My cousin's wedding is in mid-July, I think. I don't know how many days we'll be in Wisconsin, but the last thing I want to happen is that none of us will have time for the House on the Rock. I don't want Mom to be all, "DURRR, you can't go!" or any of that mess. Yes Mom, I'm fully aware there will be a line and a lot of people there. I'm just praying like hell that I'll be able to arrive on a good, less-crowded day. It's... I really want to go. I'm aching to go to that place like Rapunzel's mom wanted that damn rampion. EXPERIENCE. I NEEDZ EET. :(

Stress aside, James' 21st birthday was a success, and I got to meet some new friends who happen to live in the same city as me~ ♥ It's so awkward though, they've got an XBOX 360 in their apartment room and I have no idea how the controls work. :( I want to bring the SNES with me though, or the FC Twin. Yeah, the latter sounds even better, especially since it can play both NES and SNES. Dunno how the family or my brother feels about me wanting to borrow the Wii though. And I'm so terrible with plugging things up, it's so embarrassing. :(

My fanart folder is so cluttered. Auuuuugh. D:

Drat. I'm probably not gonna make it and finish the Chatot quest on time for GPX+ aren't I? XD That's what I get for being bored with the site and getting distracted! XDDD;;; So much for the Articuno egg. Oh well.

To-Do

- Finish the Long Ridge Writer's Test. Read your last sample out loud and make revisions, then ask someone to beta. Print out the two passages you finished and attach them to the test (make sure they have my name and date on it), package everything and mail it in. Then cross your fingers and pray. THE most important thing on this list.
- Shower. That I can easily get done.
- Finish that N/Touko kinkmeme fic you anonymously promised OT. I dunwannaaaaaaaaaa. ;; Yes I can.
- Then you can pay attention to the SacredHonorshipping (Eusine/Morty/Falkner) prompt someone left there. zomg though so tempting and it'll 'prolly help me concentrate on my N/Touko fill, who knows. My god, it even implies the headcanon I have for those three, particularly Eusine and Falkner. ;; Ohhhhh the agony of indecision.
- Sketch Virginia, Vienna, Cassidy, and Dr. Medlock from my novel. Possibly Andy/Marius, but roflcopters, I'll 'prolly be too tired for that. XD A. So I can make an art post. B. The other characters in my book need attention, not just Marius. Playing favoritism as an author is baaaaaaaad. C. So the people interested in my writing can see what my characters look like, even through my crummy art. ^^;;;
- Scan my lame Pokemon sketches for a meme I finished. Hehe. XD

I wish I was as easily organized as Twilight Sparkle. :(

- The family's been doing housecleaning today, mwoiiiiiiiiiiing~! I'm taking a small break to say hello~ ♥

- Is it me, or does the "Exciting Nimbasa" song number from the Pokemon Musicals bear an uncanny resemblance to "The Masochism Tango" by Tom Lehrer? I'd be happy to dress my Pokemon for the Masochism Tango. Oh yes. <.<;;;

- Holy shit, Shiny Audino in GPX+! *-* He's a boy, so I named him Taboo after my in-game Audino~ ♥♥♥

- The rapey N/Touko requests on the pokanon Kink Meme makes me cry. D:

- Speaking of Kink Meme, I'm gonna dig around for a couple prompts I've written and post them on my creative journal, including a recent Grimsley/Marshal I answered. :o I've been thinking of filling more prompts... what do you think, flist? But I dunno, I'd rather hear your requests. Hmm... I'll have to think about it. After working on my novel for a while, it'd be nice to refresh on my Pokeymanz, nom. I'm kinda in a gen mood myself. Whooooo character/Pokemon study!

- Going to look for those drabbles now. Hoo boy. @.@;;;

Man, the comments on my last post were sheer entertainment. ;D Sometimes I feel bad for having such a sheltered childhood, but reading these actually make me feel grateful. XD It's fun listening to what other people think, even though I'm at a loss for words myself.

Speaking of books I'm glad I missed, I would've thrown The Last Herald Mage trilogy against the walls and stomp on it to death. Talk about everything I hate in GLBT novels! So much contrived coincidences for the excuse of needless drama too. And it's only the first book! Yet reading people's reviews and reactions makes me lol. They ease the pain of the melodramatic WAAAAAAAANGST and make it funny. ;D

Huh. I found an email in my inbox that said, "Merry Christmas from Red and Yellow." My thoughts immediately went to PokeSpecial, and I thought, "Huh? Who's writing this to me? :o" Then it turns out it was sent by the M&Ms company. CURSE YOU SPAM.

I would've liked it if Red & Yellow wished me a Merry Christmas though. ;_;

DON'T MIND ME these are just thoughts swimming around my head. Might as well type it out.

My biggest problem with the movie was how friggin' useless Sheena was, especially when you had an interesting plot bit such as Damos & Arceus yet even that just wasn't well thought out. So how would I handle it if say, I had to write a manga adaptation of the Arceus movie, assuming I can draw and meet deadlines and all that jazz? :P Let's see...

( In which Chibi Dialga, Palkia and Giratina bounce on Papa Arceus' back while he's trying to read. )

I think WAY too much about crappy Pokemon movies. It's fun though! XD Boy oh boy I can't wait to reinstall Photoshop so I can work on PokeNikki my creepy Rise of Darkrai fangame again. ♥

For one week, recommend / share:
Day 1: a song
Day 2: a picture
Day 3: a book
Day 4: a site
Day 5: a youtube clip
Day 6: a quote
Day 7: whatever tickles your fancy

Smart Bitches, Trashy Books :: It's fun reading reviews that tear apart bad romance novels~
Cute Overload :D :: AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW! (Aka this is where I get all my cute hedgehog pictures~)
Engrish.com :: The homepage on Dad's computer. XD
BIttorrent PocketMonsters :: Get your subbed Pokemon here! Includes Movies 5-11 and the Raikou Special~ ♥
Smogon University :: For the Pokemon Elitist in us all. XD Good if you're looking for tips on how to raise your Pokemon for competitive play. :o
Squiby :: The best and cutest adoptable site in the world, where you can even make your own~! ♥
HYDRA SYSTEM :: To help you level your Squibies~ ♥
NaNoWriMo :: Oh god it's getting closer. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. I HAVE TRUST THAT I'LL HAVE COMRADES FOR THIS. I BETTER.
Write or Die :: Got Writer's Block? Want to write but can't be bothered? This is what Dr. Wicked's Writing Lab is for! Too bad Puri's STILL too unmotivated to use the site itself. This will be a pivotal tool for NaNoWriMo. :o
disturbingbooks :: My favorite kind of literature~
runaway_tales :: Writing originals? We got plot bunnies for you in all different kinds of flavors~! Place makes me hungry for ice cream too. Cute and delicious are the best combination. Mmmm~!
wtf27 :: I still don't know what fandoms to write for this. XD There's always Eversion, but... yeah. XDD;;;

Puri likes sites that deal with writing~ ♥

[Error: unknown template qotd] Movie: The Lion King. :P I don't dislike it, but I get tired of hearing how it's ZOMG TEH BEZT DISNET MOVIE EVAR!!11!1 I dunno, I just think Simba is a moronic brat and that ruined it for me.

The only thing I liked out of Magnolia was the music and the raining-frogs scene. Everything else was pretentious and depressing and filled with a despicable cast to "represent humanity". Ugh.

The Onion and everyone and their mother is recently BAAAAAAWing how underrated Babe 2: Pig in the City is all because it's darker than your usual kiddy film. Um, no. It should STAY unpopular, because it was that bad. The sequence of events to make Babe's life miserable is annoying and stupid and there's a giant clown who dies, and someone wears his inflating outfit in his place. DO NOT FUCKING WANT EVER. It's a MikeMedia fetish nightmare that should stay buried forever.

Books: Giovanni's Room and Brokeback Mountain. Because the doomed forbidden romance of gay douchebags is ZOMG SO ORIGINAL AND DARING AND DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!!!1111!1!!11 regardless of the billion times the same plot was written before. I started liking out Great Gatsby but got disgusted by its end. Now for the shocker: A Child Called It. Did you know David Peltzer made it all up? That it was a fake? :P

Food: Tons. :P

Band: I liked one song by Snow Patrol that was cute, but that's about it. Same with Muse with a few of their stuff,  but listen to their 3-5 best songs and you've heard them all. @.@;;; Rammestein isn't doing anything for me either, and I'm not crazy about Marilyn Manson except for oh, a couple of his covers. Ouch. :/ And Nickelback has lost its charm, blegh.

TV Show: Ed, Edd N' Eddy. I HATE that show. It's vile and disgusting and the animation is the ugliest I've ever seen. I can't watch it without feeling sick. :/

The Jonas Brothers need to fall off the planet and die, but no one's surprised by that. :P

So, Chrono Trigger. It's one of those "backside fandoms". It's not something I actively explore, but if I'm with friends who also like the game, I'd be more than happy to discuss it with them. :) I kept meaning to write a short Cyrus/Glenn fic but I never really had the time or inspiration. Darn though. Someday. That'd be fun. Frog/Glenn is my favorite character from the get-go, though Robo/Prometheus also makes me wibble. He's like Sonic's E-102 Gamma if he had the chance to develop and live and make friends, and him getting beaten up by his siblings and later seeing what happened to Atropos makes me DDD: inside. I'm not sure if I ship Robo and Lucca as a pair (says the girl who ships Gamma/Amy, Shadow/Omega, Metal Sonic/Amy, etc.), but I definitely love their friendship and I like it when Sarah or Jamie talks about them. :) The biggest thing I've contributed to the fandom was an AMV about the rivalry of Magus and Frog and the hatesex that inevitably followed. I didn't think I'd EVER like Magus/Frog at all, let alone care enough to make a video about them. But there you have it. oO;;; DAMN YOU FANFICTION.

Geez. Proves that the campus video game store is made of all kinds of amazing. Not only does it still has a cartridge of Earthbound, Super Mario All-Stars, Secret of Mana, Super Metroid, Super Mario RPG, and all the classics, but the store has a copy of Chrono Trigger too. Oh my fucking god. You know how rare that is? Chances are it can be bought for cheap here too. You should see the prices SOAR on Ebay! @.@;;; Oh well. Puri turned in Pokemon Ranger (Manaphy intact. I never beat it! XD) and got Platinum in its place. Buwahaha~ ♥

I'm starting Toni Morrison's Jazz for my Banned Books class, which is beginning a postmodernism kick. I'm hoping it wouldn't be as disappointing as Giovanni's Room was, though Catcher in the Rye I liked. Those and studies aside (and all those Greek Tragedies I gotta catch up on! :o), I fetched Coraline by Neil Gaiman from Barnes N' Noble before coming back to Austin. I absolutely ADORED the movie to bits and pieces. Of course I must read the book! I read a few of Gaiman's stuff before, so hey, I can trust him. I'm half-way in the book already. :) Maybe the style is a bit sparse for my liking, but this is a children's book. I've been reading complicated material for quite some time. XDDD;;; Plus I don't really see it as a minus, as it leaves a lot of room for the imagination, which definitely owed to Henry Selick's creativity for the movie. *__________* Also the cat is like every cat I know in the real world, haha. XD It kind of reads like Roald Dahl only spookier. Which is more than good enough for me. ;D

Oooh! Ooh! And it really surprised me! One of the illustrations in the book featured a bunch of crude objects, including a small sketch of what looks like a Pikachu head with button eyes. Remind me to scan it later! *___________*

Here's a small collection of books I want to finish/read in the future:

- Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events: The End (Book the Thirteenth) (Final book. I own it. I don't feel like finishing it right now, but I love this series so when I find the time, I will. :o SPOIL ME AND DIE)
- Stephen King - Misery (I love this book! X33 I'm a sucker for stories about authors and tale-within-a-tales, and add ANOTHER bonus to the villain being a creepy stalker and worships Paul Sheldon with an intensity not unlike various fangirls in fandom. And worse, maybe on a scale worse than the rabid Twilight cultists who assault and even murder people for saying bad things about the series. oO;;; Dude Annie Wilkes. You amaze me. I also want to finish this book so I can watch the movie and marvel at Kathy Bates's performance. *________*)
- Mikhail Bulgakov - The Master and Margarita (I'm a Mikhail Bulgakov fangirl. I MUST find this book. This line alone makes you want to read it: Manuscripts don't burn.)
- Harper Lee - To Kill a Mockingbird (WHY have I never read this book? Or watched the movie? Gods, in my spare time, I fucking MUST. Is it sad I already feel warm and fuzzy and full of hope for humanity when I think of Atticus Finch. He's supposed to be the greatest literary hero ever. *_______*)

I also have the Manaphy manga, but that can stay on the backburner. Hahahahahaha. XD

Austin is awesome because once a week I get a new free issue of the Onion. It's the greatest satirical newspaper in the world! Here's a few headlines:

International: U.S. Troops In Iraq Excited To Finally Return To Afghanistan
Opinion: Would That I Had Someone Special With Whom I Could Share My 'Galaga' Achievements
American Voices: Christian Salt Introduced
Advice: Ask A High-School Student Who Didn't Do The Required Reading