shamanicshaymin: Quote from Napstablook from Undertale (Kyouko/Mami :: Gothic)
So I wanted to finish my second playthrough of the Halloween Hack so I could write a big essay comparing its themes with Undertale's.

So how does it hold up? Spoilers: Halloween Hack, Undertale, and Madoka Rebellion. TW: Brief paragraph where I talk about a scene in HH that reminded me of sexual assault. )

Anyway, what I did with this guy was incredibly fanfictastic and I really really doubt that in reality (in Itoi's mind) that he is like this AT ALL. But he's just one of those characters that's boring and not explained at all, so I fleshed him out a whole lot and here we go he's cool now.

HOLY SHIT THOSE ARE EXACTLY THE SAME THOUGHTS I HAD WHEN I TRIED TO DEVELOP TONIO IN MY ABORTED RISE OF DARKRAI SEQUEL
shamanicshaymin: Quote from Napstablook from Undertale (Madotsuki :: Blood on Her Hands)
I don't know when I'm loading the Realmscon photos, since I don't have a cable for my phone yet. So instead, let's talk about Undertale.

I did both peace and genocide runs. I'm going to go indeph in spoilers into this, and Undertale is the kind of game you should NOT be spoiled for. So... play it first, okay? Then come back and hear me cry.

Inside the labyrinth walls, there lies a tiny child who sleeps alone )

And this child I will destroy if you try to set her free )

I recommend playing the peace run, then if you're wondering THAT much about the genocide route, you can play it up to a point... THEN FOR THE LOVE OF GOD STOP AND RESET BEFORE YOU FACE ASGORE. That way, you'll get all the extra dialogue about what you've done that round for the next playthrough, but still have a chance to redeem yourself. You can always watch the genocide ending on Youtube. Listen to people when they say personally beating the genocide run will ruin the best ending forever. Not just in a metaphorical/psychological sense. It literally WILL.
shamanicshaymin: Quote from Napstablook from Undertale (Madotsuki :: Falling)
Had I the heavens' embroidered cloths,
Enwrought with golden and silver light,
The blue and the dim and the dark cloths
Of night and light and the half-light,
I would spread the cloths under your feet:
But I, being poor, have only my dreams;
I have spread my dreams under your feet;
Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.


~He Wishes For The Cloths Of Heaven~
~William Butler Yeats~


Happy 10th Anniversary, Yume Nikki. You've changed my life forever and made me the Indie Horror nerd I am today. You've changed the gaming world forever and influenced new masterpieces such as Ib and Dreaming Mary. I will always and forever be in your debt.

Annnnnnnnnnnnnnd while typing this, my computer freaked out and randomly reset while screaming at me like Uboa. How fitting.
shamanicshaymin: Quote from Napstablook from Undertale (Toadette :: OMG)
I'm reading Gabriel's Inferno for a sporking project with Zelda Queen, and AUUUUUUUUGH it's the worst fucking book I've read since Fifty Shades. Though I think they piss me off equally so far. But god, Julia is an idiot and the writing is Tell-Don't-Show and there's slut-shaming and it loves to tease you with things that are Actually Interesting before immediately diving back into wangsty abusive bullshit. I FUCKING HATE EMERSON HE'S CHRISTIAN GREY 2.0 GOD WHAT A TEMPERAMENTAL SCUMBAG DICK HOW THE FUCK DOES HE STILL HAVE A JOB

That’s when he saw her. He stopped, staring across the street at the attractive brunette.

'Calamity Julianne.'

Except she was not alone. Paul was holding her abomination of a book bag and walking with her. They were chatting easily and laughing and strolling dangerously close to one another.

'Carrying her books now, are we? How very adolescent of you, Paul.'


Hear that? Everyday politeness = adolescence.

FUCK YOU EMERSON. FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU. *deep breaths* At least I only need to spork Chapter 16...
shamanicshaymin: Quote from Napstablook from Undertale (Grover :: Monsters)
Remember that one quote by J.K. Rowling? Let me tweak it a bit: "If you want to see the true measure of a man, watch how he treats his NOTP and its shippers, not his OTP and their shippers.

You know what? I've been keeping this bottled for a while. I've spoken with close friends about it, and they made me feel better enormously, so I thought that was the end of that. But I might as well tell you what happened, DW and LJ.

So, there's these two artists who are twins in the Earthbound fandom who draw for an obscure pairing: Jeff/Poo. They've put a lot of thought into their headcanon (Jeff and Poo would eventually raise a couple Mr. Saturns), their art is cute, and their smut is tasteful. Unfortunately, there's a reason I don't follow them on tumblr and separate their art from them as people. And it looks like that reason won't be changing anytime soon.

Ladies and Gentlemen? This is how NOT to react to your NOTP. )

tl;dr: I'm a horrible, dirty Jeff/Tony shipper, and putting Tony in art (especially with Jeff) is offensive, because HE'S EVERYWHEEEEEERE OMG.

Anyway, off to feed the campus cats. They'll cheer me up.
shamanicshaymin: Quote from Napstablook from Undertale (Serena/Calem :: Supporting You)
Stardust writer Neil Gaiman reveals how Gone With The Wind kept his refugee cousin alive during WWII.

In this video, best-selling writer Neil Gaiman reveals how his cousin, Helen, smuggled the book Gone With The Wind into the Warsaw Ghetto during World War Two. She would read the novel at night and tell girls in the ghetto what had happened the morning after. The story gave him a personal insight into how writers can offer an “escape” from suffering.

Gaiman has written an exclusive piece on his trip to Syrian camps for Yahoo. It is contained within this article here.


I want me and my books to be like this for people someday. ;;

I almost teared up reading about Ayman and everything he does for the Syrian refugees. What a wonderful, wonderful person. ♥
shamanicshaymin: Quote from Napstablook from Undertale (Luigi :: Sob)
...It finally happened. Mom and Dad may get a divorce.

Basically, my Dad became friends with a patient of his named Jenny. Somewhere along the way, they fell in love, but they agreed not to have a sexual relationship. Annnnnnnnnnnd Mom just found out about it.

To be honest, I saw the divorce coming. I've wanted to get away from Mom for a long time, and I'd take Dad with me because she's been doing a number on his mental health. I just don't know what the hell is going to happen. Dad and I know that Mom won't be able to take care of herself. My brother is likely to stay with her and he has a job now, but he won't make enough to be able to support her. And there's no way my relatives will put up with her. Mom's been constantly berating and verbally abusing us for years (my brother and maybe my sister is the only one she still has a good relationship with), but she can't support herself.

I told Dad that Jimmy and I have an open relationship. And now Mom knows too. Initially, I wasn't going to tell her because then she'd go "So THAT'S why he hasn't been seeing you! He's been with another girl!" and use it against me next time we fight by railing on that he doesn't really care for me (1. Jimmy's been getting ready for a con in Dallas. 2. He's probably afraid to visit me because he doesn't want to get involved with Mom's drama or her fights with Dad) With those reasons, I understand why Dad didn't tell Mom about Jenny. (That, and he didn't want Mom to threaten her) Dad obviously still loves Mom. He's very concerned about her health and doesn't want to leave her by herself, even after all their fights and her constantly belittling and triggering his PTSD. That's why he's stayed with her, because they've been together for years and years before her mental illness took over her personality. He has never, ever, cheated on her in their whole marriage. And there's a HUGE difference between cheating and loving more than one person.

Anyway, I was trying to defend Dad by bringing up my open relationship, and she's convinced Jimmy isn't sincere though I tell her he's been nothing but. She says that what goes on between me and Jimmy is none of her business, but that from now on, he should wear a condom for my own safety (Yeah, as if he totally isn't an intelligent and responsible guy who doesn't know what he's doing) Jimmy's been honest with me since Day 1. If he had feelings for another person, he tells me. And Jimmy and I talked to each other in great length about it. I know he loves my best friend Aspen as much as he loves me, and there's a girl he likes too. Jimmy, Aspen and I are like a trio. An OT3 where Aspen is my moirail and Jimmy is my matesprit. When I told Dad that, he said, "And now, I think I finally understand that."

I want to stay with Dad and Jimmy, but we don't know what's going to happen to Mom. Or me and Dad, for that matter. It seems the longer I stay with my family, the worse things get. I don't know when I'll be able to move in with Aspen in Portland, though. If it doesn't seem likely anytime soon, Dad's thinking of getting an apartment for me. Though if you're a close friend and you want to offer me a temporary place to stay, I'd humongously appreciate it. *hug*

Nice to know that my life keeps getting kicked in the balls.
shamanicshaymin: Quote from Napstablook from Undertale (Luigi :: Sob)
So, um. I was bored. So I watched Puella Magi Madoka Magica: Rebellion last night.

I'll make this brief. Spoilers, of course. )

I need time to recover. I really, really do.
shamanicshaymin: Quote from Napstablook from Undertale (Elsa :: Queen in Blue)
Here's a list of all my unfinished fanfiction and plot bunnies! Bear in mind that if a story has a title, it's definitely not its final one. I'm just naming them based off what their filenames are called.

Without further ado, the list from hell. )
shamanicshaymin: Quote from Napstablook from Undertale (Pikachu/Buneary :: Take My Hand)
It's been a pretty crappy birthday for Knuckles the Echidna, but in the land of Animal Crossing, life goes on. Here's some photos I've been taking of my recent adventures!

 photo HNI_0039_zpsf38eda51.jpg

"TOTALLY NOT THIS GAME, OF COURSE."

First, let's break my heart and go to Tazmily. )

Puri cries herself awake to a concerned Luna. Next town!

And it's got the same name as her own! )

Photos from places I've forgotten... )

Back to the waking world! )

Now we're back home! )

Marius comes to Magicant! Plus QR Code. :3 )

Next time on Animal Crossing, I'll upload two new outfits... both which belong to characters from existing games! Who could they be? Hm...
shamanicshaymin: Quote from Napstablook from Undertale (Elsa :: Magic)
Sheesh, I've gotten so bad about updating my DW/LJ lately.

Anyway, this week's gotten a lot smoother, thankfully. My English professor ended up being absent one day, but finally, she was able to come back Monday and I was able to see her. She said not to worry about being absent. :) Here's an excerpt from my very first day:

Conversation is as follows. )

There's a boy in the class named Angel ("My name is Angel... and yes, that is my fucking name.") and we're reading a lot of fun stuff in class so far. :) My Biology Lab is run by a professor named Jennifer Lawrence ("Yes, that's my name.") and they've got a fish, a tarantula named Lolita Dos, a snake named James, and an unnamed rattie in their own tanks.

On February 4th, an exotic petting zoo is coming to campus. They'll be bringing a ton of animals. :3 At the top of my head: kangaroos, wallabies, coatimundies, skinks, bearded dragons, tortoises, pac-man frogs, snakes... and best of all, chinchillas and hedgehogs! ♥ It's been several years since I've held a hedgehog, and I've been longing for their prickly cuddliness again. I wonder what color chin-chins they'll be having too.

I've been going to Eric and Nicole's house with Jimmy a lot, so I've been making friends with the pets there: a female yellow Labrador named Star, a male orange kitty named Pixel, and three female guinea pigs named Ruby (long-haired albino), Halle (short-haired, orange & black), and Ginger (short-haired, brown & white.) The piggies are as big as Ryu, and they make little cooing noises like doves when they're petted. ;; My friends want me to bring over Ryu some time, so I'll need to get a better cage for him so he'll be able to travel.

I joined HabitRPG, which is a lot of fun! I was worried I'd flunk, but it's been helping me with the little things, like holding Ryu more often. :)
shamanicshaymin: Quote from Napstablook from Undertale (Elsa :: Queen in Blue)
Concept art of two of Don Bluth's canceled projects.

Don Bluth's Beauty and the Beast
East of the Sun, West of the Moon

If these movies were more like Dragon's Lair and less like Thumbelina, they would've been absolutely awesome. Alas, I only have dreams of a parallel universe. ;;
shamanicshaymin: Quote from Napstablook from Undertale (Madoka :: Relief)
Dys4ia

"dys4ia is an autobiographical game about the period in my life when i started hormone replacement therapy. it's a story about me, and is certainly not meant to represent the experience of every trans person."

Simple and effective, and it'll take you at least three minutes to finish. This is a wonderful game. ;;
shamanicshaymin: Quote from Napstablook from Undertale (Alice :: Daisies)
On the Importance of Magical Girl Heroines & Weaponized Femininity

Bolding is all mine, nomnomnom.

The Magical Girl genre is essentially a genre which explores the female Heroine’s arc, the female coming of age story, and the womanhood narrative with varying degrees of success or failure — but it gets explored. I’d be hard pressed to name a whole lot of series that allow women to play every single archetypal role in the heroic book the way say, Sailor Moon does. Because Usagi Tsukino is a regular girl who is sort of clumsy and a bit of a bad student, but kind and loving and sweet. She is the “regular young girl” who begins a journey into becoming a powerful woman. She might initially play at being the virginal Princess type, but let’s face it — her future child drops out of the sky, and there’s never any sort of real play at insinuating she’s a bad person because she grows up. Usagi is a Warrior, a Queen, a Mother, a Lover, a Friend, a Sister - the Heroine of the story. She saves her own boyfriend/consort’s ass regularly from the bad guys. Essentially, she’s the hero, and the story is about her.

It’s more complex than that, of course. Her weapons are pink and shiny and come in the form of compacts and wands with heart and moon shapes. She wears a sailor fuku, she’s got long flowing hair, she’s feminine, beautiful, and when she doesn’t trip first, she’s going to kick your ass in the name of the moon (and love and justice). Being a girl is her weapon. Being feminine and a woman is her weapon. Some of the other Scouts have other presentations of themselves and their genders, but that’s just it - womanhood and girlhood, and gender, and sexuality, and so on — has a spectrum. It’s all there.


+

Kyubey isn’t the devil. Kyubey is the society we live in, which takes up and preys on young girls at vulnerable times in their lives, and asks them to be perfect. Society asks girls to fight against evil, the icky, awful, and impure, and it keeps asking until we say yes. Yes to being beautiful, and perfect, and good, and pure, and sweet, yes to being a nice young lady, yes to fighting everything that is bad and evil and dangerous - to fighting the things that threaten us and our friends.

Except there’s a catch. We’re fighting ourselves. What they don’t tell you, society, or Kyubey in this metaphor, is that there is no way to prevent yourself from becoming what you started out fighting. You lose, in this scenario, every time. At some point, a young, “emotionally volatile” girl grows up and becomes a woman. One day, you hit puberty, or maybe you haven’t yet, and someone leers at you, or looks at you wrong, or calls after you and you are suddenly made aware of the fact that being a woman is dangerous. Growing up means something incredibly different for girls than it does boys.


And this part has PMMM spoilers. YES. THANK YOU. This is how I see Sayaka. )

You become a witch or a bitch the day you fight back. And even if you don’t fight back, you’re going to become a witch or a bitch eventually. That’s the unfortunate truth of growing up female — sooner or later, society will betray you. And while you might not become Walpurgisnacht, it can be as simple as a hiss in your ear, or a seething message in your inbox. You’re an emotionally out of control girl, you’re evil, you’re bad, you’re a slut, a whore, or a bitch, or hysterical, or over reacting. You become a woman in a society that hates women. And if and when you react, you get tossed straight into the bin of evil terrible things.

Sorry for copy-pasting so much. This is just my way to convince you to read the entire essay. :P So go go go!
shamanicshaymin: Quote from Napstablook from Undertale (Tirac :: Evil Has Never Felt So Good)
Review of FATAL, the world's worst RPG.

I can't believe I hadn't read this earlier. The review is hilarious. The game, on the other hand... The sheer badness of this game is... legendary. :o

I don't know whether to laugh or cry.

On an unrelated note, my current music is totally Homura's theme.
shamanicshaymin: Quote from Napstablook from Undertale (Morty/Eusine :: Closer)
I'm not sure what to think of Neil Gaiman's writing. I like most of his stuff, sure, but I feel like the Internet overhyped him in a way. I like his ideas a lot, but sometimes, his style doesn't really click with me, and I don't know why. That said, I just finished reading Smoke & Mirrors, a collection of short stories. Let's check it out! :D

Oh yeah, and there's spoilers. Lots of them. )


Favorites Overall: Reading the Entrails: A Rondel, Chivalry, The White Road, Queen of Knives, Changes, Virus, Bay Wolf, We Can Get Them For You Wholesale, The Sweeper of Dreams, Babycakes, Murder Mysteries, and Snow, Glass, Apples.



Adopt one today!Adopt one today!Adopt one today!Adopt one today!Adopt one today!Adopt one today!Adopt one today!
shamanicshaymin: Quote from Napstablook from Undertale (Rarity :: Wangst)
A man and a woman can write books about the same subject matter, at the same level of quality, and that woman is simple more likely to get the soft-sell cover with the warm glow and the feeling of smooth jazz blowing off of it.

Dear god, it's so true. Imagine if it was a Britney Easton Ellis who wrote American Psycho or a Charlotte Pahlaniuk who wrote Fight Club. American Psycho would have a pink cover with a giggling smilie-face, while Fight Club would look like an enormous shopping ad with a pink bar of soap, complete with brand name and fluffy bubbles. Look at some other gender-flipped books and be amazed.

This article breaks my fucking heart. (TW: rape, slut-shaming, and obvious sexism)

You're a war photographer, and you get stuck with a title like "Shutterbabe." How fucking lovely.

You know, independent publishing is starting to look more appealing by the minute. The last thing I want for my Lovecraftian horror novel inspired by Eversion is to have some kinda "tee hee!" cover of a "sexy" chick posing in the middle of a sunflower field while being ogled by werewolves or something. (Which don't even appear in the novel)

Adopt one today!Adopt one today!Adopt one today!Adopt one today!Adopt one today!Adopt one today!Adopt one today!
shamanicshaymin: Quote from Napstablook from Undertale (Madoka/Homura :: Peace)
Nostalgia Critic vs. Mike Myers in The Cat in the Hat

Words cannot describe how much I hate this movie. It's part of my Unholy Quadrilogy; they're movies that I've sat through from beginning to end (watching only parts don't count, otherwise Garbage Pail Kids would've been included) that I consider the bottom of the barrel. They've made me rage, pull my hair out, and feel like my brain had caught cancer. (The other three? Tentacolino, Cool World, and A Troll in Central Park)

So seeing NC rip this movie's organs out is quite satisfying.

But the main reason that I'm linking this review? Because of the speech at the end where NC stresses the importance and value of classic children's literature, pointing out they're not "just for kids." It's so beautiful. ;;
shamanicshaymin: Quote from Napstablook from Undertale (Ignis/Angela :: Human Affairs)
My dreams can be really cruel sometimes. I dreamed I was reading this awesome Sonic comic and I was excited about getting the next one. There was also an ad for a SatAM movie done by professional animators (who worked for Animaniacs, Tiny Toons, etc.) called "The End", which is basically supposed to be the conclusion of the entire series. Dear lord, if only that was real. ;;

Also, this AMV is amazing. I know jack about Eva, but the editing... wow. *-*

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