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shamanicshayminToo bad IRL, I can't cause earthquakes and set people on fire like she can.
I'm just fed up. Fed up with everything. Fed up with killjoys, fed up with morons, fed up with extremists, fed up with myself, fed up with being a failure. Fed up with whining and not being myself. Fed up about whining about other people. Fed up with being unable to write. Fed up with not being able to enjoy anything because I'm too busy being angry at other people tearing what I like apart. Yes I'm vague. Yes I do it on purpose. Yes if I'm specific, you'll be angry with me. I don't blame you.
Maybe I should build a seperate FO-LJ. (Friend's Only account) Not because I'm shy. Not because of stalker reasons. Just a place where I won't be afraid to express myself before people I know I trust. Yes, there's a couple of you on my flist whom I'm angry at. Not giving names, of course. But you may or may not know who you are. I don't like being hostile to my flist, especially when I treasure you and want anyone and every random visitor on my LJ to feel as welcome here as possible. A lot of you, I'm okay with. Don't worry about me, chances are we haven't even spoken long enough for me to be mad at you. But 1, 2... probably 3 people. I'm afraid I have a bit of a skeleton to pick with you. Perhaps my thoughts of you will improve once I'm no longer angry. But even then, that peaceful period isn't bound to last long.
So you know? I believe anger and hatred are unnatural and should be repressed as often as possible and when nessessary, especially the latter. Anger, we feel now and then. But hatred? It'll eat you. It'll gnaw and make you want to rip your insides. Anger and hatred together? Consider yourself doomed. Heck, look what it's done--doing to me.
Yes I'm immature. Yes, there's a lotta contradictions in this entry. Yes, there'll be more causalties.
I'm just fed up. Fed up with everything. Fed up with killjoys, fed up with morons, fed up with extremists, fed up with myself, fed up with being a failure. Fed up with whining and not being myself. Fed up about whining about other people. Fed up with being unable to write. Fed up with not being able to enjoy anything because I'm too busy being angry at other people tearing what I like apart. Yes I'm vague. Yes I do it on purpose. Yes if I'm specific, you'll be angry with me. I don't blame you.
Maybe I should build a seperate FO-LJ. (Friend's Only account) Not because I'm shy. Not because of stalker reasons. Just a place where I won't be afraid to express myself before people I know I trust. Yes, there's a couple of you on my flist whom I'm angry at. Not giving names, of course. But you may or may not know who you are. I don't like being hostile to my flist, especially when I treasure you and want anyone and every random visitor on my LJ to feel as welcome here as possible. A lot of you, I'm okay with. Don't worry about me, chances are we haven't even spoken long enough for me to be mad at you. But 1, 2... probably 3 people. I'm afraid I have a bit of a skeleton to pick with you. Perhaps my thoughts of you will improve once I'm no longer angry. But even then, that peaceful period isn't bound to last long.
So you know? I believe anger and hatred are unnatural and should be repressed as often as possible and when nessessary, especially the latter. Anger, we feel now and then. But hatred? It'll eat you. It'll gnaw and make you want to rip your insides. Anger and hatred together? Consider yourself doomed. Heck, look what it's done--doing to me.
Yes I'm immature. Yes, there's a lotta contradictions in this entry. Yes, there'll be more causalties.
