'Cause it's cold, cold, cold in my hole, hole, hole...

[shamanicshaymin]

Dude. I actually read fic today. First was Sonadow, and it was actually pretty tame on the badfic level--didn't make me writhe in excruciating pain like others, but it obviously wasn't the best--neither was it something I'd click the "Add Story to Favorites" button anytime soon. So it was at an "Eh..." level.



Sonic: You suck Shadow Faker!
Shadow: Haha, I'm superior to you, Faker. Lemme capture you and tie you up in ropes 'cause I like destruction and feeling superior to you. *singing* Ohhhohhhohhh yeah~!
Sonic: Faker! And that pretty much sums me up characteristically. FAKER!

~


Shadow: Voices in my head, am I jealous of Sonic?
Voices: You liiiiiike him, you liiiiiike him~!
Shadow: Nooooes, I hate him! I fight with him all the time!
Voices: 'Cause you wanna be cloooooose to hiiiiim!
Shadow: And anyway, he fucking hates me anyway! I could have two broken legs tomorrow, but I can't handle the burden of rejection!
Voices: SHADOW! *KICK*
Shadow: Okay, fine. We'll see what happens, but don't blame me.

~

Sonic: Voices in my head, am I jealous of Shadow?
Voices: You liiiiiike him, you liiiiiike him~!
Sonic: Nooooes, I hate him! I fight with him all the time!
Voices: 'Cause you wanna be cloooooose to hiiiiim!
Sonic: And anyway, he fucking hates me anyway! I could have two broken legs tomorrow, but I can't handle BEING USED BY HIM AAAAA FAKER
Voices: SONIC! *KICK*
Sonic: Okay, fine. We'll see what happens, but don't blame me.

~

Shadow: Good mooooooooooooooorning Sonic Faker!
Sonic: You suck, Shads! (Yes, he calls him that. Twice. The first time outta spite, at least)
Shadow: Ohhh, I can't handle the agony anymore! I kiss you! *does so*
Sonic: ...
Shadow: Oh yeah, gotta untie the ropes.
*DADADACUEMUSHYINTERLUDE*
Sonic: fhwbjyhyrkOMGIthinkIlikethisIfeelfreakedomgwhatifhe'sgonnaleaveme!?
Shadow: fhwbjyhyrkOMGIthinkhehatesmeeeee! Sonic!
Sonic: Oh my god, you said my name!
Shadow: Yeah, I'm leaving.
Sonic: *weeps Vaderstyle* NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOE~!

~

Shadow: *comes back* Why are you weeping?
Sonic: ...I love you Shadow. T-T
Shadow: Really?
Sonic: Yeah!
Shadow: ...Awesome. *picks him up bride-style* *it even says so in the fic!*
Sonic: Heeeeey! Put me down! Shads! Dammit!
Shadow: No.
Sonic: ...Hey, I didn't know you had a well-kept bed in your Mysterious Funky Dungeon of Nowhere.
Shadow: Get the massage oils while I get the speakers to play Frank Sinatra.
Sonic: ...But--
Shadow: Sonic, I'm SICK of Gorillaz. And besides, it's weird.
Sonic: *whine* gesgeyey Fake.

*Chapter Ends with Lime*



And Puri also read *dadadada* Shadamy! *glass vase falls and breaks, cat screeches, a random woman screams* The first fic was so-so, but MAN, this one...? :( Bitchy Elitist Mode Time!



It's a blue moon, I know. For the writing itself, it actually wasn't that bad. I even liked a few lines here and there. And... *cough* the smut wasn't bad either, even if it did get a little sappy/Harlequinish. *NUCLEAR WEAPONS* Seriously though, if Cream is still six years old in this, that would make Amy... hoo boy, Shadow's definitely gonna get arrested, and my mood is totally broken and replaced with squick. But! More importantly.

STOP MAKING SONIC AND ROUGE VILLAINS FOR CHRISSAKES. IT'S MARIO BEING THE BAD GUY FOR BOWSER/PEACH AND LUIGI/PEACH ALL OVER AGAIN!

Maybe Rouge in this fic, I can get (but come ON, my common sense tells me even SHE wouldn't be like this!) , but geez, just 'cause Amy's over Sonic doesn't mean he's suddenly OMG SUCH A JERK AND EBIL AND HORRIBLE OMG. *SIGH* Poor Sonic. Either Weepy*Uke Extrodinare or Worldclass*Jerkoff. Even AoStH*Sonic had sweeter things to say to Scratch and Grounder And Robotnik than what Sonic does to Amy in these kinda fics. :(

And after Shadow does the "Haha Rouge, I'm dunking you for using me, sucks to be you!" scene, it looks like Rouge is gonna get her revenge by accusing Shadow of him raping her to the police or something--definitely something I'm going to have seizures waiting for the next chapter for. Ohhhhh YES!

Hint to Puri: if you see the word "fucktoy" in a fic, run the hell outta there.



Eek! 11:30. I'm up WAY too late, and tomorrow's a school day. AUUUUGH

That kids, is why I never read M-rated fics. :D Or at least rarely when I 'm curi--a masochist!

Told my Mom goodnight so she wouldn't have to walk in here to find me awake on the computer ranting about funky "Sonic" badfic. XDD

And I wish this song were more than one minute long, I'm getting addicted. I even found it from a "Penny Arcade" FST. :o Okay, shutting up for bed.